I Wanna Ruin Our Friendship
by Queen of Queer
Summary: This story takes place after the events of Big Escape and so on. Is it worth it to ruin a rare companionship? Is it better to hide or show it? When the time comes, it will make sense. The pairing is Britai x Exsedol (Breetai/Exedore).
1. Why?

**A/N: Welcome! I'm sorry! This chapter needs alot of work! *sigh* So please, bear with me... **

**[EDITS]: I had to change some dialogue, since I can change somethings anytime I want and critiques from my Deviant. Yeah Earth sayings are not their forte either... (Changing~ La).**

* * *

In the quarters of Commander Britai Kridanik, who was removed from action after the failed attempt on recapturing the four Miclones, was now looking the room and the pain of failure stilled lingered.

He was walking towards the bed, he started to recollect on what happened several days ago. He didn't know why, but it didn't really matter. All he could do was lie down, and think.

_Humiliating, this is just humiliating_,Britai thought.

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. He turned his head; he didn't want any company at this point in time. But, the commander wanted to know who it was.

"Yes?"

"Commander, this is Exsedol. May I come in? I just wanted to see if you were alright."

Britai could have said he wanted to be alone, but he wanted to get some things off his chest. And yet, there was some other unclear reason why he wanted to see the little bug-eyed red head.

"Come in," acknowledged Britai as he sat up.

Exsedol came in the room, and can already tell that the room didn't offer a lot. There was just a bed, a couple of chairs, a small closet, and a personal water closet. Nothing special really from the eye can see.

He takes a few steps towards the commander, and makes eye contact. All there was between the two was space for their thoughts to pass to one another.

The advisor started, "I've notice how you were acting today. You seemed troubled like I was about the news, and I thought you might want to talk about what was bothering you, sir. But, if you want to be alone, I understand."

"No, it's fine," Britai says.

He didn't know where to start actually. There were so many things going through his mind. He looked down, and was thinking of an event(s) that stood out the most. Then, he remembered a couple of moments and looked up to the archivist.

"Yes, you could say I still feel a little uneasy having a Meltran taking my place on an important task. Its still feels embarrassing", stated Britai.

"Hmm, you're still thinking about that?" asked Exsedol

"Yes."

"It's alright. It could be worse."

Well, to be honest he was right. It could've been worse, like getting nearly decapitated by a Miclone fighter jet. But, he did have a question that was related to that incident.

_It's bad enough losing the upper right portion of my head_, Britai considered.

"Exsedol, I do have question. Is it alright if I may ask?"

"Yes, what is it?"

"How would you react if I died?"

The short red head was taken aback by the question. Because, in their race no one mourns for the lost of a comrade, they all knew they will die in battle one day, so there was no point to feel sorrow. Yet in his case, Britai was the only person who he can call a friend. He didn't know how to respond to this.

"Well, to tell you the truth," the archivist paused. "I don't know if I mourn or not if you did pass away."

Exsedol curiously looked at the turquoise man; and then realized why the commander would ask that kind of thing.

"Was it because of what happen back at the command post?" he asked.

Britai nodded solemnly, "Yes, it was.

"But, I do have another question though."

"Uh, sure," said Exsedol with an uneasy tone in his voice which in turn Britai noticed.

The one-eyed commander inquired, "Why didn't those two male Miclones kiss?"

Now, Exsedol didn't except that to come out of the commander's mouth. Even now he was questioning why Britai would want talk about this. But, he didn't know how to respond.

"Um, that one is little hard to explain too Britai," he answered while looking behind as if someone was observing their small talk.

"What's wrong?" Britai asked.

"Nothing, I just have to finish some work. I'll see you some other time," Exsedol responded as he pivoted.

The advisor went for the door at once. But while he was walking away, Britai couldn't help but look at his friend's blooded coloured hair. He wanted to reach out and touch it, but restrain himself. All he did was watch his friend leave the room.

Britai looked around his room once more. He was alone again. The only thing he could call company were his thoughts.

_Why did I want to touch his hair?_, the commander mumbled to himself while running his fingers through his own.

He then felt some warmth growing on cheeks' and ears'; trailed his fingers to them.

"What is this?" Britai questioned himself.

He stood up and went straight to his personal bathroom to see what it was. He turned on the lights and looked into the mirror.

Staring back at him was a man with short black hair, and grayish-pale green coloured skin. His cheekbones defined as ever. A single thick arched brow, and under it a blue eye: a type of blue that was a storm at sea. A polished face plate with a green crystal eye piece that was over the spot where his right eye used to be, and tear drop shape ears on the side of his head were evident.

But upon closer expectation, his cheekbones' and ears' were stained with a light shade of red. He knew himself well that he never turned red when he got angry. Yet, he wasn't truly furious, just slightly unnerved from today.

He felt his chest starting to swell up some and his stomach turning at the same time. All this was happening because he was thinking about skinny Exsedol, and was disgusted by how he was acting.

He never felt this way for anyone before. Well, no one did. The males and females were always kept miles apart, so they wouldn't produce this kind feeling for one other. But, nobody would expect that the same sentiment would pop up on two people who were the same sex: right?

The 34 year old pressed his back against the wall, slid to the ground and hugged his legs. The giant was still thinking about petite Exsedol. Britai tried to push the thought of him out, but with no avail.

"Damn it, pull yourself together," he murmured.

What was it about the advisor that seemed to cause him to act so flustered?

After a few minutes, he finally put the mental image of his friend away, and the colour subsided. Britai looked around in confusion as if he had forgotten where he was. He shuddered and squeezed his legs tighter.

_What's wrong me? Why am I acting like I'm afraid of you?_, he questioned.

In the middle of all this, he heard a knock at his door. He got up quick, leaving the bathroom and to the door. He opened it and there was a lieutenant who was about average height, and was delivering reports for the superior to look over.

"Sir, these just came in", he reported as he handed them to Britai.

"Um, right", he said as he took the reports.

Then, the man walked away to whatever else needed to be done. Britai looked at the direction where the man went, but the lieutenant was long gone.

Britai closed the door behind him, and looked at the thick mass of reports. He was astonished by the amount. He could have bound it together and called it a book if he wanted to. But, there was no use in complaining. He just wanted to get this done and over with.

He went over to his bed, slump down onto the floor, and leaned against it. He started to read the first page, and it was about Milia successfully infiltrating the three spies into the battle fortress. The second was Kamjin's attempt at destroying that very ship, and Laplamiz putting a stop to it. The others were nothing special, but most them were about Kamjin's uncalled for attacks.

_My patience slowly grinds away with that man's tactics! Anybody who ever had this bastard under their command probably wanted to kill him as much as I do! _, Britai thought.

He recalled the many temptations to end the Ally Killer's life, but time and time again he didn't. He didn't know why, but soon or later that man's life will have to come to an end.

About several minutes into the stack of reports, he began to wonder what Exsedol was doing.

_Probably the same, but does he have it worse than me or the same?_ , he wondered. Britai continued to wonder until the thought of work didn't matter anymore.

He snapped back to reality in for several seconds, and realized he still needed to finish the pile. So, he picked on where he left off while putting the very thought of him away.


	2. Thinking

**A/N: By the time this chapter is up, I'm gonna edit the title, summary and the first . This pairing of mine is not canon (duh). Although I may call it my OTP, I do not wish it to be canon. It is the creators over at Studio Nue, Artland, and Tatsunoko Productions don't really care. So I bid thee a farewell for now, and enjoy.**

**Some random edit: Crap! I forgot to look up Britai's branch fleet number! Ugh! I might as well remove the 506,347 since I can't seem to find it... I can replace with the class name of his ship, that can work. **

* * *

Exsedol was heading back to his quarters thinking over the events of today. There was also something else going through his mind. Something that was hard to explain…

_Kissing with someone who's the same gender… I wonder what makes it any different?_, he wondered and shuddered for asking.

He reached his destination and went in closing the door behind him. His room was no bigger than the commander's. It had the same items like a small closet, a bed and a personal bathroom. The only difference was the medium-sized bookcase shoved into the far corner of his room; a chair and desk that was next to the door way. He only had those things because of his rank as an archivist. No one else had them, not even the man who commands the Nupetiet-Vergnitzs class flagship.

The pale mauve man adjusted his indigo cowl some, and looked over at his desk. There were only two piles of paper. One had three pieces of paper that needed to be looked over, and other was a medium sized pile where they were already checked and notified.

He turned and took a look at the three. They were nothing special really. Just the status of the ship, and the time and place the battles happened.

For some reason, when Exsedol was finished with the last three, he began to think about the one question that Britai asked: How would he react if the man's life was cut short?

_Would I really miss you or would I be like everyone else? _

He thought about it.

_If you were dead, my life would be different. That I know._

He thought about the changes: being under someone else's command, the chances of being in this mission would be close to zero, not knowing what a kiss and anything else the Miclone culture had to offer were, and probably wouldn't be in this mess. But one thing was clear; he would have no one to _talk_ to.

To be honest, he actually liked it when Britai talked about something other than strategies. Strategies were for the battlefield nothing more and nothing less. A rare conversation or small talk seemed to make him feel- well he didn't how to describe it.

The only thing he could say was how it made him feel alive from the rarity of it. Exsedol just savored every word, every syllable that came out of the dark haired man's mouth. He enjoyed those small moments so much, the mantis eyed man didn't know what to do if he was deceased.

He sighed when the answer was clear. _I guess I'll just go on with life like everyone else._

Exsedol looked over to his bookcase, most of them once belonged to his mentor; he ran his fingers through his thick blood red hair. Thinking maybe one of them will keep his mind off of him for while.

He walked over, looked across the shelves – his little slender fingers trailing across every spine -, and picked one. The chosen book didn't have a title, but the only thing that was on the cover was the person's name which looked a little ineligible for an alien language.

Actually, this was the fourth time he read it. Even though all of them were factual, he had read them couple times, there was something about this that seemed to draw his attention more than all others.

He looked back to his desk, and thought maybe it was better to turn the reports in before reading. Exsedol set the book on the bed, went over to his table and picked up the stack, and left the room; making his way to Lord Bodolzaa.

Hours seemed to pass by slowly. He made it back to his quarters closing the door the behind, and walked over to the bed. He sat on the bed, taking off his utility boots, and adjusted the pillow against the frame. With the book in hand, he put his back against the pillow and began to read; the soft sound of ships coming in and out of HQ, the only thing relaxing so far.


End file.
